Small Man Media: Masters Of Pop

You have 10 seconds in which to name three Top 40 hits by INXS starting… NOW!

The more observant among you will notice that we have started this week’s blogstravaganza with the final prize round from the Radio 2 pop quiz Popmaster, as featured on the Ken Bruce morning show. Answers at the bottom of the blog, by the way.

Popmaster is something of a cult of all cults. On any given day you will find it trending on Twitter, as workplaces all around the country grind briefly to a halt so that employees can play against the radio. Here at Small Man Media, we are no different – at around about 10.30, we momentarily stop writing, tweeting, blogging and ideas generating, and join in the fun. Why are we talking about this? Because it is literally THE ONLY TIME THAT SMALL MAN MEDIA EVER STOPS WORKING.

Ken Bruce: A giant among men, a master of pop
Ken Bruce: A giant among men, a master of pop

Christmas is thundering towards us, of course, and so it’s not so much a case of ‘noses to the gridstone’ in our office as, ‘why don’t we have grindstones surgically implanted into our noses so that our noses can be attached to the grindstone all the time?’ The office stockroom currently looks like a Santa’s grotto of delights, stuffed to the rafters as it is with festively fantastic things from the likes of Sheaffer, AT Cross, Mustard, Artline and Bridgestone, and quite frankly, if we do not find good homes for every last item by the time the first snows fall, we will not be celebrating Christmas. Those pigs in blankets we can’t wait to tuck into? They will be going in the bin.

Pigs in blankets: Mankind's greatest creation
Pigs in blankets: Mankind’s greatest creation

One of the gift ideas that is getting us very excited is Mustard’s range of T-Rex highlighter pens, which as the name suggests is a number of highlighter pens that happen to be shaped like the king of the dinosaurs, the Tyrannosaurus Rex.

This got us all thinking, in the office, as to what our favourite dinosaur would be. The conclusions make for fascinating reading for anyone who has ever wondered to themselves: What would be the favourite dinosaurs of the people who work at the West Midlands’ toppermost PR agency? And they are:

Head Honcho Ben: “The pterodactyl. Because it flies. It’s that simple.”

Big Enchilada Rach: “The tyrannosaurus. I like his little hands.”

Demolition Man Dan: “The stegosaurus. They look quite scary but they’re not, they’re herbivores, you know.”

Mother Superior Michelle: “The brontosaurus, because he [Michelle seems to think all brontosauruses are male] has a big long neck.”

Writer Monkey Pete: “The ankylosaurus, because its spiked club tail could be used to repel predators, and also because they are the best bit of Jurassic World.”

Mustard's T-Rex highlighter pen: It's dead ace
Mustard’s T-Rex highlighter pen: It’s dead ace

But it’s not all dinosaur discussions and gratuitous sausage wastage here at SMM. We are thundering towards the crucial cut-off point of the Firestone Battle Of The Bands competition for 2017, and we are frankly beside ourselves with excitement. The closing date is THIS VERY SUNDAY, as in October 22, as in two days after this blog drops, which is a roundabout way of saying that any musical acts out there who fancy taking a big step towards superstardom, and a bumper prize of two grands’ worth of Orange Amplification Equipment and another £1,500 worth of studio time, can still get involved at battleofthebands.firestone.eu

And with that, we bid you all the very finest of British weekends. May all your puddings be Yorkshire.

Oh, and you could have had Suicide Blonde, Never Tear Us Apart, The Devil Inside, Need You Tonight, Mystify…

This blog was composed by Small Man Media’s Writer Monkey Pete Cashmore, who this week has managed to get into a Twitter spat with former X Factor winner Steve Brookstein, go viral to the tune of 114,000 impressions with a tweet about James Corden being a berk, and get trolled by Celebrity Big Brother loser Samantha Brick, if anybody remembers her. Which they definitely don’t.

Writer Monkey Pete, seen here hard at work even though it was his lunch hour
Writer Monkey Pete, seen here hard at work even though it was his lunch hour

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